Real Life Stories - January 2009 (best of Elise)
From Don B:
Dear Ms Sutton, here is my own account of my encounter with female superiority and how I came to believe that it really exists and can affect men anytime.
A couple of years ago I was to be treated for a minor medical problem. The surgery was a success, but I suffered from after effects of the anesthesia and had to spend some more days in the hospital. During this period I had ample time to watch the personnel and their affairs. I noticed a nurse who seemed to run the station. Although she was unremarkable on the outside and soft spoken, it was she (and not one of the senior doctors) who was in command; albeit in a subtle way. When she suggested a task (she never gave orders) it was immediately done; even the doctors complied. I noticed that the younger medics avoided looking after the young nurses whenever she was near, she had her way with the staff.
The anesthesia had affected my blood pressure to an extent that I felt too weak to leave the bed and had even to be carried to the washing room. However, to no avail, my bowels didn’t stir a bit and on the third day
the nurse I am talking about entered my room and announced that she had to give me an enema.
I was a bit shocked and didn’t comply immediately. But she seemed to be familiar with my reluctance because she lifted my rug without the slightest hesitation and asked me to turn onto my side. Then she put on a
surgical glove, applied some lubricant to her index finger and when she asked me to relax. I was much too stunned to resist. All in all, her finger slid in rather easily.
It was when she withdrew her finger that she noticed the effect her hand had had on me. “Look who’s misbehaving,” she said without embarrassment and shoved the nozzle in; I reacted even stronger. Afterwards, she left me without any further comment and during the entire day, whenever she happened to look my way, I blushed like a schoolboy.
In the evening she returned. She closed the door, came closer and lifted my rug as if to check my bowels. But her hand remained only briefly on my belly, instead it ran down and began to fondle my sex! This time I was
really shocked and I closed my legs. “Behave,” she said in a stern voice gripping my testicles and believe me or not, I followed suit.
She let my testicles go and commenced stroking my member which reacted promptly and when its rigidity was to her satisfaction she pulled a surgical glove from her pocket and slid the thumb over like a condom!
I was beyond words when she straddled me and guided my member in. It was a situation, which probably for most men would be a dream come true but was all but absurd for me: a woman I didn’t even find attractive had with a plain command made me put my penis into a glove so she could have her will with me. I didn’t enjoy it at all. The makeshift condom pulled painfully at my small hairs, I didn’t know how long this would take and my bowels suddenly stirred. I concentrated on keeping my erection while she resumed the rhythm that suited her best. But my worries were premature. Within a minute her hips moved swifter and then she shuddered.
It took her only a nick to regain her composure. She climbed off me, straightened her skirt and, ever the attentive nurse, pulled the glove of my placid penis (it hadn’t been necessary), put the rug back in place and
wished me a good night. I was left in total bewilderment.
How was it possible that this nurse had such a power over me? What was it that made me comply to even such a bizarre act as I had been through?
The next day she didn’t give any indication on what had happened and a day later I was released as my condition had improved. I never saw her again.
Till today I marvel about the power this nurse had over me and I wonder if I’ll ever understand. There is a lingering effect of the special treatment that nurse gave me: I’m not into anything kinky, but whenever I see a nurse putting on surgical gloves, I stiffen immediately.
Elise’s Response:
There is no doubt that hospital settings have been known historically to lend themselves to sexual incidents, especially when male nudity and vulnerability meets female nurturing and authority. However, these types of incidents are extremely rare these days now that the health care system is ran under an incredible amount of supervision and oversight. I do not doubt the sincerity of those that share these experiences but I sometimes wonder if these events actually happen or if the male patient enters into a fantasy dream under the influence of medication, or in your case the anesthesia.
Nurses have frequently been equated with female domination because they are women of authority. In the hospital setting, the patient is submissive to the nurse. It does not matter how successful or macho or masculine he may be, the male patient is often helpless, vulnerable and under the authority of the nurse. FemDom fantasies and FemDom desires can be created and aroused within the male psyche as the female nurse sticks her patient with needles, administers enemas, performs a variety of painful and uncomfortable procedures and interacts with a patient when the patient is in a vulnerable state of being (naked except for a gown, using a bedpan, etc)
Of course as society evolves we are seeing more and more female Doctors and more and more male nurses, but there is little doubt that historically the Nurse has been a popular female authority figure to the male gender. The Nurse is simply doing her job but the submissive nature of man can become aroused and stirred by being helpless and at the mercy of this female authority figure. The Nurse may inflict pain on her patient (albeit for the male’s own good) and such an experience can trigger FemDom desires, and that comes back to the male need for discipline and nurturing at the hands of a woman. The Nurse represents loving female authority as she both hurts and heals at the same time.
No matter if your sexual experience with this Nurse was an actual event or the product of your submissive nature under the influence of anesthesia, the fact remains that you found this woman to be dominant and her powerful presence has had a lasting effect on you. There is no need to be perplexed, because the male desire for female authority is common and natural. This particular Nurse represented female authority to you and deep down you still desire to be helpless to a woman. Take care.
From Ms Kathy’s boy:
Dear Ms Sutton: Both my Wife/Mistress and I very much enjoy your web site. We have been in a fem/dom relationship for over 15 years. As a young person, just out of high school, I went to work in one of the many chemical plants in the Baton Rouge area. In 1984 I was laid off when the bottom fell out of the business and rather then looking for another job, I decided to return to school.
Based on the aptitude test, a consular at LSU suggested the paralegal program. At that time most paralegals were women, but she told me that men were starting to enter the field, and that it paid reasonably good money. Upon graduation I found a job with a large New Orleans law firm. Since I was relatively new and without much experience, they assigned me to one of their junior attorneys. She had just graduated from law school and was a full 10 years younger than I was.
At first it felt strange to have a female boss. She was outgoing and aggressive while I was on the shy side. She was very sure of herself while I lacked confidence. She could tell I was a little nervous, and did everything she could to make me feel comfortable. She came out and asked me how I felt about working for a woman.
She told me that she liked having a male work for her, and felt that we had a good chemistry. It was important to her that I respected her as a boss and that I did what she told me to do. That included a few personal things like getting her coffee, cleaning her desk, and an occasional errand or two when she needed it. I had never been around such a confident lady, and told her that I would do my best to please her.
Over the next few months we worked very closely together. As a new attorney, she was expected to work a lot of overtime. I often stayed late just to be around her and I went out of my may to do personal errands for her. The more jobs I did for here, the more she gave me.
Finally, one evening after we had both worked late, she invited me for dinner at a nearby restaurant. Over a casual dinner she told me how difficult it was to have a career and a serious relationship with a man. She had just broken up with a guy. He wanted her to leave her job, and move out of state with him. I half jokingly said that if she went out with me she could be the boss both at work and at home, and that her career could come first. We both laughed, but I could tell it was something she might be interested in.
Several days later I told her that I had extra time on weekends and if she needed me do something for her, I would be very happy to do so. After thinking about my offer she told me that there was something I could do for her. She was having a wedding shower for a high school friend of hers. She asked how I felt about cleaning up the apartment for her. She also asked me how I would feel about staying for the shower to serve drinks and sandwiches. I jumped on the opportunity.
That evening changed our relationship from boss/employee to Mistress and servant. A few weeks later she invited me to move in with her. We eventually married and we have a loving relationship. We both know she is the boss, and we both like it that way.
Elise’s Response:
Your experience is a wonderful example how a man can make the FemDom lifestyle a reality. You sincerely enjoyed serving this woman and you were not threatened or intimidated by her position of authority. You dedicated yourself to supporting her and serving her and she realized the joys of being in a relationship with a submissive male.
It has been said that dating is the ultimate job audition. Obviously some people date just to have fun or in order to have a fulfilling social life, and sometimes romance happens when people least expect it. But when people are serious about finding a significant other, the date is like an audition where you sell yourself by showing the other person what an asset you can be to them. Most of the time people put on airs, erecting a phony façade in order to hide their true self because they fear their date will reject them. A man with submissive desires will often act macho because he thinks a woman wants that. Men will make phony claims about their careers and try to build up their careers to sound overly important in order to impress their female date. Then they will marry a woman who buys into the false façade and they will do a 180 after marriage and try to introduce the woman to female domination. And guess what? The woman is shocked because she was sold a false bill of goods and the man is disappointed that his wife is resistant to the female domination lifestyle. Well, perhaps if he had been honest from the beginning and had focused on the woman during the dating process and had dedicated himself to serving her during the dating process, she would have been more open to female domination (or maybe they would have realized they were not so compatible).
But you were honest and authentic and you won your wife’s heart. You auditioned not only for her in the work place but you showed her by example that you would support her in her endeavors and that you would submit to her within a personal relationship. The two of you are a perfect match because you both were upfront and honest with each other. Her dominance attracted your submission and your submission attracted her dominance. Your relationship is a wonderful example to others who are seeking what you have.
If a single man wants to find himself in a female domination relationship that is based on love and trust, he must be willing to demonstrate to a woman his willingness to serve her and his willingness to place her needs above his needs. If he can do that prior to, and during, the dating process, he will greatly enhance his chances of attracting a woman who will be open to a female domination lifestyle.
I wish both you and your wonderful wife all the best.
From Wilson Z:
Dear Ms Sutton, my story goes to show how female domination can begin innocently and grow into a 24/7 lifestyle.
My wife was reluctant to try female domination when I showed her your site. She read over the forums and stories and articles but she didn’t believe any of it was real, or if it was the people were ‘out there’. I didn’t know what to tell here other than I respected her intelligence and that I would live according to whatever lifestyle she would choose for us. I told her all that mattered to me was that she was in charge and I would go along with whatever she wanted.
I never thought I was being clever but somehow I stumbled upon an approach that introduced her to the power of female domination without topping from below. I was sincere when I told her that all I wanted was for her to be in charge. We did not have to be kinky in the bedroom, she did not have to wear fetish outfits and we did not have to do anything she read on Elise Sutton’s site. The only rule was that she makes the rules and I obey them. That was it and she agreed.
She started slow, not much of a difference in the beginning but I went out of my way to do everything she asked of me. My wife took notice and about a year ago my wife re-read your site because she was looking for a starting point. She found the article on your site about women shaving their men’s privates (Eve Hogan’s “He said, She said” – bottom of page 17 in Mainstream Articles Section). My wife decided that she wanted me to be shaven so she told me that I was to shave off all of my pubic hair.
Something like that seems so innocent and harmless but the power it had on me was immense. I felt totally emasculated. I was a little embarrassed about my condition but I was noticeably aroused sexually. My wife enjoyed touching my smooth skin around my genitals and she commented how nice it was to fondle smooth balls.
In the beginning, her rules were very mild. She got to pick what we watched on television and things like that. My wife was not accustomed to being in charge so she did not take bold steps at first. But as time went on, she began to be bolder. She even humiliated me a couple times about my hairless ‘region’ and one time she reprimanded me rather forcefully because I had not shaved for two weeks and some of the hair was coming back. Her solution was a bikini wax in that area. She bought the stuff from her friend who is an esthetician and my wife performed the bikini was on me. Talk about hurt, but I was smoother than ever. She later expanded my ‘region’ for the bikini wax to include my legs. This made me feel even more emasculated.
My wife began to demand that I do more of my share around the house. This grew and grew and grew and now I do most of the housework.
My wife began to take more control of the money. My wife began to make most of the decisions in our marriage. Some of her decisions have been the opposite from what I wanted but if I ever fight her or disagree, she reminds me of our rule ‘The only rule is that she makes the rules and I obey them.’ She reminds me that this rule was my idea.
I was just thinking the other day how far we have come. Has it only been a year? She has become so dominant in such a short time. And to think that she was against this lifestyle. Now when she reads your site she no longer thinks it is kinky or only for people who are ‘out there’. It all seems natural to her, and to me.
We are not into B&D or S&M but our marriage is totally Femdom. The most recent development was when my wife took us down a road I was certain we would never travel. A year ago I would have bet our house that my wife would never be interested in cuckolding. However, she met a man she had dated back in college. He was in town on business and he saw her at a trade show my wife organized here locally. She told me she was going out with him ‘as friends’ to catch up on old times. They went to dinner, out to have some drinks and ended back at his hotel.
She came home very late, I waited up. Upon entering the house, before I had a chance to ask her about her night, she reached into my shorts and grabbed my smoothly shaved genitals and gave them a twist as she led me to the bedroom. She undressed, she pushed me on the bed, she straddled me and told me that she had just had sex with another man. I was ordered to perform ‘clean-up duty’.
She has only cuckolded me that once but now I know she is capable and she may do it again if she pleases. This was the hardest thing to submit to but when we discussed it she reminded me ‘the only rule is that she makes the rules and I obey them.’ Hearing her talk like this makes me feel at ease. I have come to trust her decisions and I feel really good about where we are at as a couple.
My advice to men out there who are as eager as I was for a female domination marriage is to share that one simple rule with your wife. I don’t know how any woman would resist that rule. It puts no pressure on her and she can take the lifestyle into any direction that she wants. All you have to do is follow her lead.
Elise’s Response:
Wilson, I couldn’t have said it any better. There is a saying in business known as the KISS principal ("Keep It Short and Simple). Your marital directive "the only rule is that she makes the rules and I obey them" is a simple philosophy that a couple can live by. It is a simple philosophy in how to live the female domination lifestyle but it covers everything.
The wonderful revelation you have had about female domination must not be overshadowed by the cuckolding experience. That is where your wife took your relationship on that one particular night, and I am sure that some of the male readers of your story will be aroused by that, and that’s Ok, but it must not overshadow the importance of how you introduced your wife to this lifestyle.
You gave your wife the precious gift of agreeing to submit to her no matter where she decided to take the relationship. She could have taken the relationship into a very vanilla direction with the only FemDom elements being domestic. And had she done that, you were fully prepared to submit to that. You were not going to complain because you made a commitment to her.
Your submission in the little things (like allowing her to decide what the two of you will watch on television) gave her the strength to expand her dominance to bigger things. That led to the shaving of your genitals and that led her to exercise more authority over you by assigning you more chores, etc. And your obedience in those areas showed her that she could push the envelope with you. Now you are in the kind of marriage you always dreamed about and it has nothing to do with fantasies but it has everything to do with you submitting to a woman.
Thanks for sharing this with us and I hope others will benefit from your example. Take care!
*** Note - More Real Life Experiences in the January/February edition of "Predominant 2009".
